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Friday, February 8, 2013

How to Avoid a Disastrous Valentine’s Day


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Valentine’s Day is next Thursday.

I know what you’re thinking, right? Who cares? Well, a lot of people—given Valentine’s Day is the second most celebrated holiday in the world besides New Year’s. If you don’t believe me, look on Wikipedia or go to the nearest mall. See what I mean?

Sometimes it’s best to face the beast full on rather than going through great lengths to escape it.

For instance…

If you are married to a guy who doesn’t see the point in Valentine’s Day (especially after marriage!), there are a couple of ways to go around it. What I do is, I use the same strategy I use for special dates, such as anniversaries and my birthday: I start hammering the idea into his head ahead of time. This way, it won’t happen he’ll say something like, “Oh, is it Valentine’s Day? I forgot.” By the way, don’t you love how men conveniently “forget” things?

So, be ruthless. At least once a day, remind him about Valentine’s Day. Print a picture of the dress you want from the Macy’s website, and leave it on the top of the kitchen island. Just in case, draw a red arrow. Have ProFlowers send him the monthly specials by email. Really, do whatever it takes. What to give such a man? Something painfully practical, like a gift certificate to Home Depot or to that music instrument store.

But what if you’ve just started dating someone two months ago and aren’t sure where you stand? You’re meant to go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day, but it falls on a Thursday and you two usually  meet on Thursdays anyway. What if he prepared this nice surprise and you went there empty handed? Well, simple solution: Buy a gift for him and put it into your bag. Play by ear and wait to see if he has a gift for you. If he does, you’ll open your smart purse and smile inside because you have one for him too—and also because this relationship might go somewhere. If he doesn’t have anything for you and doesn’t even mention Valentine’s Day, he’s a sadist. So unless you’re into BDSM, get out while you can.

What if you’re single? There are a lot of different options here for this one. A) You’re single, fierce, and don’t need these silly dates to remind you you’re better off alone. Whenever you feel like diving into a cookies-and-cream ice cream pint or taking calls from telemarketers just to talk to someone at the end of the day, just think of your best friend’s husband. Really. What was she thinking? She married the most inconsiderate, rude human being on Earth. There are times, in fact, you feel like sending him a thank you note because his existence reminds you every day that you’re better on your own (until the right guy comes along, that is). So anyway, great. You’ve got it all worked out. B) You really try not be angsty or go on a rant every time someone asks you about Valentine’s Day. You don’t have a date this year, and that’s totally fine with you. Friends and family often envy your effortless self-confidence. You know that, just like this silly blog post, Val’s day, too, shall pass. C) You normally wouldn’t care (see B), except the office where you work looks like one of those seasonally decorated stores. There are little hearts everywhere, and even the temp has her share of Hallmark cards at her desk. You know everyone will be getting flowers. And bears. And phone calls. Sadly, you don’t have any sick days left. And you dated two guys from different departments over the past six months. Solution: Send yourself flowers. Tons of them. Have the people of the office guess. And when you open the card, chuckle and say something like, “He’s crazy.” If anyone asks, just say you’re not seeing anyone and this was just someone you met. That’ll kill ‘em. :) 

 Do you have a funny or memorable Valentine’s Day story to share? Please leave a comment to enter the Amazon $25 gift certificate giveaway. I’ll announce the winner on February 16th.  Meanwhile, let’s keep hoping. :) 

78 comments:

  1. Nope,don't have a funny Valentne's Day story. I will say the only guy I've celebrated V-Day with is the guy I ended up marrying. :)

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    1. Awww... how sweet :) How many of us can say that?
      Thanks for stopping by, Nicole. And good luck! :)

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. Hi, lorem... what a terrific story! Sorry about you getting sick on your honeymoon though, that's never good.
      I can imagine how hard it must be to get a large amount of red roses on Valentine's Day. But I'm sure it was all worth it! Happy Anniversary :)

      Delete
  3. two years ago my boyfriend surprised me with a trip to Miami for Valentine's Day -- it was such a great trip to go somewhere warm in the middle of winter and I'd never been before! We had the best time!

    booksconsidered[at]gmail[dot]com

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    1. Hi, Eva!

      That's for sure :) I love Miami!

      Thanks for the comment and good luck :)

      Delete
  4. My daughter's boyfriend had 2 dozen roses sent to her from the florist one Valentine's Day. They were stunning! Lots of baby's breath, ferns, a plastic heart, and glitter. My husband came home holding a pathetic bunch of flowers he picked up from the local convenience store - they were half dead! When he saw my daughter's roses, he picked out some of the baby's breath and the plastic heart trying to make his look better. It didn't help!
    @CarolYemola

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    1. Carol, LOL!

      Such a "husband" thing to do! lol I totally hear you :)

      Thanks for the comment and have a lovely day.

      Delete
  5. One year my boyfriend was so proud since he hid a necklace in a box of chocolates. I guess I was just focused on the chocolate since I opened it up and took one out and closed it without noticing. It is funny to think now of him wondering what in the world to do. Finally he had to open it and show me

    fencingromein at hotmail dot com

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    1. Aaaww that's so adorable. He's a keeper! :)

      Thanks for the comment!

      Delete
  6. i don't have any real romance stories..don't have much of a romance life

    parisfan_ca@yahoo.com

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    1. You know what? That's okay, too :)

      Thank you for your comment, Laurie!

      Delete
  7. My hubby is of the first type you mentioned, so when he bought me flowers a couple of years ago, it took me a few days to stop wondering why.. :)

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    1. Oh Jemi, I know where you're coming from. Although, you never know, sometimes they might be finally getting the message... ha!

      Thanks for your comment :)

      Delete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. Lol!

      Awww... literally, you had a secret admirer. A smooth one too :)

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    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. Sorry don't have funny story but I do have a special one, my SO is back in my life after being divorced for a few years. We are a family again.

    vampiremistress2010(at)gmail(dot)com

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    1. BLH, that's great! Congrats and wishing you the very best :)

      Delete
  10. No funny stories happening on Valentines Day. The Mr. and I had our first date Valentines Day eight years ago and I got sick during the date. Somehow that didn't deter him and we're married now. lol

    romancingrakes{at}gmailDOTcom

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    1. Kati, lol.

      You know what? I'm sure it wasn't funny then, but when you look back... ;)

      Thanks for the comment!

      Delete
  11. No funny valentine's day story here either. Now that I am married, I have finally determined that if I want to go out someplace NICE, I make the reservations because I understand that my husband does nothing in advance!!

    susanmplatt AT hotmail DOT com

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    1. Susan,

      I usually have the same problem. This year, Hubby made the reservations -- a miracle! Maybe people do change after all... lol.

      Delete
  12. One year I was working at a bakery and I had to work on Valentines day. I used to make deliveries to local colleges so I was getting out of my car when my boyfriend at the time came out of no where and scared the crap out of me. I screamed so loud. Turns out- he had showed up to give me roses at work. =)

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    1. Awwww... too sweet!

      Thanks for the comment :) And good luck!

      Delete
  13. I don't have any funny valentines day stories. I have a sweet new years story though I was working the graveyard at Krispy Kreme Doughnuts and my bf than now husband of 10 years this year came at midnight when I was on my break and brought me a potted flower and filled it up with purple hersheys kisses around the flowers. such a sweetie. vbarton24 at gmail dot com

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  14. I really don't have a funny one either. I love Valentines Day tho. A night with my honey and for the kids I always get them these big stuffed animals a little basket of goodies so everyone has a good time.

    readingdiva@ymail.com

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  15. It's not really funny but the first year the Mr and I were married I went all out for V-day. I had never cooked prior to being married. So I was really proud that I made homemade marinara, a strawberry pie and a bunch of other red/pink themed food. I spent all day slaving away in the kitchen only to have the Mr. scarf down his food, get up and leave me eating at the table so that he could continue playing the video game he was playing while I was setting the table. I still don't let him live that down and he hasn't left me eating at the table since.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I would totally have poured marinara all over his video game! Lol, j/k! Well at least he learned his lesson, right? :)

      Delete
  16. My husband dislikes the commercial aspect of Valentine's Day. Rather than be disappointed at the lack of cards and flowers I've specially asked him not to buy me anything ... and instead to do something romantic instead. I rather suspect that come February 15th I'll have a funny or memorable story to tell.

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    1. Patsy, please make sure you share it with us if that's the case. ;) I'm curious! Lol.

      Delete
  17. Hmm.. I haven't celebrated V-day.. I don't think of it as something special, maybe it will change someday :)
    Karina
    swordlily_girl(at)yahoo(dot)com

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    1. Hey that's fine too.

      Thanks for your comment and good luck!

      Delete
  18. My most memorable Valentine’s Day was last year when I spent the day with my newborn nephew! My sister wanted me to go in with her while he was being C-sectioned... that day will probably be my most memorable ever.

    yadkny@hotmail.com

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  19. I don't have any funny stories. My hubby doesn't go in for all that. He does do things on the spur of the moment at other times. I have threatened to send myself flowers but never have. That just may change this year. I love flowers and hate to be the only one without....

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    1. Hey Lily!

      It's nice that he does things on the spur of the moment at other times, though. Don't we all love surprises? :)

      Delete
  20. Mine are usually pretty simple and nice and not over-the-top. My worst was the year my new boyfriend and I decided to move in together to save on rent. The next day he broke up with me... it was right before Valentine's. He was my first boyfriend and it's a looong story why he broke up with me but it was dreadfully painful at the time. (For both of us I now know). I spent the last of my food money for the week getting him a card and his favorite snacks and just stayed in my room miserable all the rest of the night. Once the thing he broke up with me for resolved we wound up getting back together but I will never forget that horrid Valentine's Day. This year will be the 15th anniversary of that one actually!

    Since then he's been a wonderful husband and valentine. ;) lol

    always.and.never AT gmail DOT com

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    1. Rhianna,

      Thank you for sharing this :) So you have both very sad and very happy memories from sharing Val's Day with the same guy. That's what makes a real love story :) Life doesn't have to be perfect.

      Delete
  21. I have the husband that doesn't believe in Valentine's day. *sigh* the best I get is last-minute Walmart flowers in said bag.

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    1. Oh Jenn, bless your heart!
      Sadly, I know those too well, lol.
      They die after two days! Ha!

      Delete
  22. Hmm. Well, my first Valentine's day was ah-mazing. My boyfriend wrote me a love letter - how many people can say that? I still have it somewhere in my room. He also got me a heart filled with Milky Way chocolates and a cheesecake from his mother. Oh, and I do not want to forget about the single red rose I got. I tried to press it between a book for a keepsake, but it rotted away. :( All in all, it was a great day! Looking forward to this year!

    chrysrawr@yahoo.com

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    1. Aawww. Isn't it great to be cherished? You've got one of the good ones, Christine!

      Delete
  23. The only story I can remember from Valentines Day was when I was 20 I think, and I had only been dating this guy like a month. So he asked me out to dinner on Valentine's Day and wanted me to pay my half of the bill for dinner. Not a super horrible story, but that was the worst one I have had.

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    1. Gosh. I don't mind splitting the bill or treating my guy once in a while. But c'mon, it's Valentine's Day, dude! Lol. Good thing though that was the worst story you have to tell.
      Thanks for your comment :)

      Delete
  24. my most memorable valentine happened on Feb 12. Without thinking about valentine's day, that was when my husband and I had our first date! dinner and a drink lasted almost 8 hours. I knew it was something special and 11 years later here we are :)

    Thanks!
    staceyprice(AT)gmail.com

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  25. Worst Valentines
    Easy-It was when my BF at the time(about 19/20 at the time) called me and said he was really sick and couldn't take me out for Valentine's Dinner--but would totally make it up over the weekend. Me, being such a sweet person went over his house and brought homemade chicken soup. His mom answered the door and said he went out to dinner with a friend. Me, shocked, thanked her then went to his fav. restaurant where he was--with an ex of his. I then confronted him and decided to pour the now cold soup all over him and share my love of not so nice words with him. His ex had no clue that he was with me and she got up and walked out.

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    1. OMG, that is the worst Valentine's ever!
      I'm glad you poured the soup all over him, though... what a jerk.

      Delete
  26. I'm an Artist and had an opening in New York after my man and I had been married 5 years. He got a sitter for the doggie, packed our son and dropped him at Grammy's, stole me from work and whisked me off to New York a week before I was scheduled to be there just to explore all of the romantic parts of the city. He did it ago at 10 years - flying us to Paris and at 15 years he took me to Melbourne - I am one lucky lady and I am well aware of it!

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  27. I'm not one who usually cares all that much about Valentine's Day, but this year a couple friends from college are visiting and we're going to do a girls' weekend. I'm looking forward to eating great food, watching chick flicks and catching up with great friends. Thanks!

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  28. no, not really. Valentine's Day is a day just like any other.

    Thanks for the chance to win!
    Froggy
    froggarita@gmail.com

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  29. Hi Carmen, I simply love your blog and have nominated you for a Very inspiring Blogger Award. To collect it's simple,click onto my blog and follow the rules. http://welshjensblog.blogspot.com

    Have a great day Jen

    ReplyDelete
  30. Not really. My Dad usually get me a gift which is nice. I have yet to have a man on V-Day so I'm still waiting to make my memories.

    mestith at gmail dot com

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  31. The only one I can think of is the year my husband's car was stolen from work and we ended up going out to dinner in a rental car.
    Thanks for the chance!
    sqwalker2@hotmail.com

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Aww.
      But you still made it, huh? Cool!
      Thanks for your comment!

      Delete
  32. Not really. I mean, I spent my last Valentine's hiding out with my best friend because she didn't want her boyfriend to find her because she was afraid if they spent Valentine's together it would mean they were "serious". Right.

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    1. Mimi, that's hysterical.
      I have a friend just like yours, lol.
      She always overcomplicates everything.

      Thanks for the comment!

      Delete
  33. No valentines story. Thanks for the giveaway.
    magic5905 at embarqmail dot com

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  34. I'm a boring married having dinner at home and am about to watch my favorite tv show and off to bed early on Valentines day. LOL

    kwanawrites (at) yahoo. com

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    1. Ha! Hey you didn't have to deal with the restaurant crowd and expensive valet services. Kudos! :)

      Delete
  35. My worst Valentine's Day ever was the first one with my current boyfriend. We had only been dating a few months so I was expecting something really great. Well, I decided to spend the night before at his house so he could wake me up to a balloon or flower bouquet, some jewelry, some Bath and Body Works, whatever his heart desired to show me how special I was. Imagine my surprise when I woke up to 3 half dead roses (later found out they were purchased at the Dollar Tree) and a card that played with the phrase "Love is in the Air" and instead it said Dander is in the air. I am sure he thought it was humorous when he purchased it. I think he knew from my reaction that I didn't feel the same. He knows not to buy me anything now except some candy and a NICE card!

    Happy Belated Valentine's Day,
    Marlena
    charmedpoms(at)yahoo(dot)com

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  36. this past valentines day my fourteen yr old son surprised me with an armload of flowers...so sweet

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  37. I don't really have any memorable Valentine's Days because it seems like my husband and I are always broke. But he is a great guy and always good to me, so that's what matters :)

    Thanks for the giveaway!
    paranormalopinion(at)hotmail(dot)com

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    1. I agree, that's what matters :)

      Thanks for the comment and good luck :)

      Delete
  38. I have no romance or story to tell really. I do have a great mom who made my day and we went to see a movie together today :) Thank you for the great giveaway and fun blog hop! Hope you had a great Vday!
    Latisha D
    tishajean@ charter.net

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    Replies
    1. Sounds good to me! I love my mama :D

      Good luck :)

      Delete
  39. WE HAVE A WINNER!

    I've used Random.org and Shannon R is the lucky winner. She won a $25GC from Amazon!

    To stay tuned for more contests and opportunities to win, make sure you follow my blog :)

    Thanks to all who participated. :)

    Enjoy the weekend, folks!

    Carmen

    ReplyDelete